Here are some actual court transcripts…

Q. What is your date of birth?
A. July fifteenth.
Q. What year?
A. Every year.

Q. What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke that morning?
A. He said, “where am I Cathy?”
Q. And why did that upset you?
A. My name is Susan.

Q. What gear were you in at the moment of impact?
A. Gucci sweats and Reeboks.

Q. Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in the voodoo occult?
A. We both do it.
Q. Voodoo?
A. We do.
Q. You do?
A. Yes, voodoo.

Q. How old is your son – the one living with you?
A. Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can’t remember which.
Q. How long has he lived with you?
A. Forty-five years.

Q. Sir what is your IQ?
A. Well, I can see pretty well, I think.

Q. And where was the location of the accident?
A. Approximately milepost 499.
Q. And where is milepost 499?
A. Probably between milepost 498 and 500.