1. Consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like an idiot.

2. Consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering
when you are not.

3. Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you are invisible.

4. Consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the same boring
story over and over again until your friends want to strangle you.

5. Consumption of alcohol may cause you to thay shings like thish.

6. Consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing
WITH you.

7. Consumption of alcohol may cause serious rug burns on the
forehead and chin area.

8. Consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher,
handsomer and smarter than some really big guy named Bubba.

9. Consumption of alcohol may result in pregnancy.

10. Consumption of alcohol may cause a flux in the time-space
continuum, whereby gaps of time may seem to disappear.