Why do elephants wear blue tennis shoes? Because the white ones always get dirty. Why do elephants float in the river upside-down? To keep their blue tennis shoes from getting wet. Why do ducks have flat feet? For stamping out forest fires. Why do elephants have flat feet? For stamping out flaming ducks. Why do […]

New exercise routine follows. If you’re over 35, you might want to take it easy at first, then do it faster as you become more proficient. It may be too strenuous for some. Always consult your doctor before starting any exercise program! SCROLL DOWN…                       […]

Two peanuts walk into a bar, One was a salted. A jumper-lead walks into a bar. The barman says “I’ll serve you, but don’t start anything.” A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says, “Sorry – we don’t serve food in here.” A dyslexic man walks into a bra. A man walks into a […]

Eleven people were hanging on a rope under a helicopter –ten men and one woman. The rope was not strong enough to carry them all, so they decided that one had to leave, because otherwise they were all going to fall. They weren’t able to name that person, until the woman gave a very touching […]

Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other and says “dam” What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh Two fish are in a tank. One says to the other “I’ll man the guns, you drive” A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet and says, “My dog’s […]

Psychiatric Help Phone Menu Thank for calling this line……….please select from the following options:- If you are obsessive compulsive…..press 1 repeatedly. If you are co-dependant…..ask someone to press 2 for you. If you have multiple personalities… press 3,4,5 and 6. If you are paranoid….we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the […]